Stampy’s replacement arrived today.It came in a box labelled ‘dangerous’, had iron bars across the front, and when I neared the corner it growled at me. After arming myself with a heelless shoe and the succulent that’s more dirt than suckle due to my masterful brown thumbs, I bravely approached the cardboard cell and unleashed the beast.
It was big.
Huger than big.
The most massively hugest stapler ever made, or at least the biggest I had ever seen in person.
The picture on the Internet looked so small and cute, and I thought it would have been the perfect replacement for Stampy; not coming too soon after his demise, yet soon enough before the piles of unstapled papers began co-mingling. If I had known that it was a model requiring an extension to my office and three horizontally challenged people to be dropped on top of it just so it could snap, I probably would have ordered the slightly smaller version.
As it is, I desperately need things to be fastened together, so Jaws and I are going to try and be friends.
Now if only I could find a way out of my office,
Ms stuck-between-a-stapler-and-an-MDF-divider M.
